At Taipei Train Station, in my Sophomore year, I once remembered 小馬(A senior member in AIESEC 中山LC) asked me "what do you want to do or study in the future?"
I replied him. “Well, not something starts with “electronic” or technical, because I simply am not good at it and never interested in it either."
"Hmm~Definitely not Languages and Literatures! It’s fun! But I simply don’t have the passion to dig into the text and study language itself for another couple of years. Probably not business either, because I don’t really like the nature of it, making money for the sake of money itself? I don’t think I can ever find my motivation to support that."
Then he said ”Then what it is? It seems you’ve ruled out everything!”
I was silent.
I couldn’t give him an answer, but I still had this idea in mind “There has to be something! Something that is practical, meaningful and so interesting that I want to devote my entire career in. I can’t name it now but the world is so big and it has to be somewhere!”
Then I kept involved in AIESEC, doing good in study and actively participated in extracurricular activities. Classmates in my undergrad class gave me titles like “a capable woman(女強人)” or “a modern woman” and assumed that I’ll become a successful business woman one day like my AIESEC peers do. Well I tried, in the first couple of years after graduation, to match the “public’s (and myself as well) expectation”. But, somehow it simply does not work! I made choices by following my heart but it often turned out to move further and further away from that expectation.
Then Tonya introduced “urban planning” to me. (For that I am forever in debt!) It’s like a new door opened in my life. I am in the master program of urban and regional planning at UCI now. It is the thing I pictured in my sophomore year. I feel grateful and excited everyday to live in the reality of my dreams and wishes. I know my insistence was right, and it is paying off now. So, I will keep sticking to my feeling, no matter how blurring or uncertain it seems now. I know that if I do believe in it, it will realize one day!
Well I have a lot of insistence, hunches and feelings in picking a boyfriend (or a husband or a soul mate.) Does that apply too? I hope it is paying off soon :P
When it doess I will post another article here! Haha~